


Q's Mentor

by SalconeDestrivina



Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Alcohol, Computers, Drunk Hacker, Fluff, Hacking, Halo - Freeform, Head explody, Humor, M/M, Minion conditioning, Romance, Tags have gotten weird, Traps, Weird Characters - Freeform, alright insane ish, have no idea how to hack made it up, mentors a BAMF, mentors a bit insane, mi6 gets hacked, q has a mentor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-27
Updated: 2016-12-21
Packaged: 2018-02-14 23:19:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2206806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SalconeDestrivina/pseuds/SalconeDestrivina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Q has a mentor whos a little.... out of the ordinary but what happens when he suddenly appears? And why did he hack<br/>MI6??</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I know its not a sherlock fiction! Sorry but this has been rolling around in my head for a bit and it needed to get out and be free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fixed the league issues.... How they manages that autocorrect I have no idea but I'm never letting anyone on my computer again!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright peoples this is getting highly irritating. I've fixed the 008 issue but there are still two hyperlinks that someone put in my friggin story and when I find out who it is i'm going to go to jail because I'm going to hurt them. just don't click on them (They're orange) they send you to random sites.

Title: Q's Mentor  
Category: Movies » James Bond  
Author: SalconeDestrivina  
Language: English, Rating: Rated: K+  
Genre: Humor/Friendship  
Published: 08-19-14, Updated: 08-19-14  
Chapters: 1, Words: 3,137  
Chapter 1: Chapter 1  
Q's Mentor

MI6 was in the process of being hacked.

Minions scrambled to find the intrusion while Q himself scrambled to throw up firewall after firewall to keep the intruder out.

Nothing was working. The hacker busted through all of the fire walls in their way and only then did anyone realize the hackers goal.

Q's computer.

"Well?"

"I do not understand! They have busted through all of my protections! But they aren't going after the MI6's server they are going after mine! And I don't keep anything on it!" Q almost screamed at M.

Suddenly the alarms were turned off and Q's screen showed a full screen command prompt.

C:\Users\Q: HELLO!

Q frowned at the screen then rested his hands on the keyboard. Then the conversation began.

C:\Users\Q: hello

C:\Users\N: There you go, now everything I type with turn up 'N' and you of course are Q :)

C:\Users\N: Figured it would be easier to keep track of the conversation that way.

C:\Users\Q: why did you hack my computer?

C:\Users\N: Oh that! well I had to get your attention somehow!

C:\Users\Q: And why would you need my attention?

C:\Users\N: I have something of yours :)

This sent a shiver up Q's spine. For Bond had been MIA for almost three hours and no one could get a hold of him no matter how much they tried.

C:\Users\Q: And what do you have of mine

C:\Users\N: Give you a hint, it's tall blond and likes to throw things.

Q's eyes narrowed at this, now he knew why no one could get a hold of 007

C:\Users\Q: And what do you plan on doing with him?

C:\Users\N: No idea, so far all Sally has been doing is glaring at me

C:\Users\N: Probably because he's tied up at the moment

C:\Users\N: Okay he's literally tied up

C:\Users\Q: Sally?

C:\Users\N: Yes, Sally, he refused to give me his name so I gave him one.

C:\Users\N: Also he refuses any water I try to give him

C:\Users\Q: he's trained to not take anything from an enemy.

C:\Users\N: Ah so he's one of your agents Q!

C:\Users\N: NOOOO! is this 007 that I've been hearing so much about?!

C:\Users\Q: Who are you?

C:\Users\N: THAT HURTS!

C:\Users\Q: what hurts?

C:\Users\N: COME ON! WHO ELSE CAN HACK YOU SO BAD THAT NOT EVEN YOUR CALCULATOR WILL LIKE YOU!

Q's mouth dropped open at that. To his knowledge there was only one person who could do such a thing. And thinking about it, given the chance, he would so totally hack him for little reason. But why did he set off the alarms?

C:\Users\Q: DAMN IT NEMO!

C:\Users\N: finally little bird!

C:\Users\Q: wait why did you set off the alarms?

C:\Users\N: thought it was only fair that I set off YOUR alarms after you had tall blond and lethal set off mine.

C:\Users\N: speaking of which why is one of your agents here to kill me?

Q went pale at the words on the screen, thinking back on the Bonds mission.

Bond had been sent out to acquire a computer that was EXTREMELY harmful to the crown.

A computer which belonged to Nemo.

Nemo who was the world's best hacker.

Even Q came up a sad second to the man he was currently talking too.

C:\Users\Q: I swear I had no idea that you were the one he was sent after.

C:\Users\N: I that I am VERY sure of. Tell your superiors that there is such a thing as ASKING and that I find them very rude.

C:\Users\Q: He is not amused. But what of the agent?

C:\Users\N: Oh Sally is still here glaring at me.

C:\Users\Q: He does that very well

C:\Users\N: Yes he does.

C:\Users\Q: Can we have him back?

Nemo sighed at the question and looked over to the corner of the room where 'Sally' was tied up. "So I have an issue here. Your boss wants you back. Which I don't really mind even though you would make a VERY interesting lawn ornament. But if I give you back to Q...yes I know who he is, you guys are going to want my computer..." He remarked as he leaned back in his chair. He successfully ignored the agent who was struggling against the ropes that bound him and glared even harder at the hacker. "Oh I know!" he grinned then began to type.

C:\Users\N: I'll just drop him off to you.

C:\Users\Q: Nemo

C:\Users\N: Nope final offer. That way MI6 cannot confiscate my computer even though i know none of you can actually get into it.

This made M laugh for he had been reading over the Quartermasters shoulder. "Won't he be surprised when our Q branch does exactly that!" He chortled making Q wince.

"Actually sir...we cannot."

"What do you mean 'we can't'?"

Q turned to glare at his boss. "If I had been privileged to Bond's mission I would have told you that this was a lost cause. Not only is Nemo the WORLDS BEST HACKER as he has shown us today. You know when he hacked MI6 in under half an hour, sounding the alarms HIMSELF. But I know for a fact that we cannot gain access to his computer and trying to destroy it would only set off several fail safes he had set in place."

M glared at the quartermaster. "So what do you suggest?"

"We let him leave or he will bring MI6 down around our ears. He has the capabilities for doing that. He could bring this entire country down to its knees with only a tablet and you want to make him angry?

"And how would you know all of this? It sounds as if you know him!"

"Of course I know him. He was my mentor." He said absentmindedly and turned back to the conversation at hand.

C:\Users\Q: That is acceptable though M wants your head.

C:\Users\N: which one?

C:\Users\Q: don't be nasty

C:\Users\N: AWWW! Come on! I haven't even heard from you since you decided to join the law side of things!

C:\Users\Q: Perhaps because it is that I am now a law abiding citizen and you are a hacker?

C:\Users\N: naw, i think you are just too busy ogling Mr. tall blond and lethal

C:\Users\Q: Actually he's too busy ogling me.

C:\Users\N: AND THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT!

Q did not hear from Nemo for two days after that, though 007 walked into the branch looking highly confused. But after a long talk which Q told him about Nemo being his mentor, seemed to understand just why he was still alive and not a blood splatter on the wall.

~~TWO DAYS LATER~~

"Ello Minat!" Someone said right behind Q making him jump and squeak.

Q turned to berate 007 [ because it was ALWAYS 007 that did that] when he found himself face to face with Nemo.

Which was exceedingly weird due to the fact that he was standing in Q Branch.

"LU!" He smiled and leaned back to take in Nemo's ever changing look.

Nemo was not tall, in fact he was bordering on being short. His hair had always changed colors when he was younger but it seemed that the hacker had settled on black this time around. Which only made his violet eyes stand out all the more. He was dressed as a punk rocker today complete with chains and spikes.

He looked good.

"I'm here to kidnap you." Nemo grinned and ran over to grab a sheet of paper off a VERY surprised minion and a marker off another. He quickly scribbled something on the paper and then stuck it to the door with a piece of duct tape stolen off yet another minion.

"Alright let's go!" he grinned and before Q could argue, dragged the quartermaster out of the branch.

"Where is Q?" Bond asked as he walked into the branch only to be pointed towards the door.

There was a piece of paper duct taped to the glass that said:

OUT TO LUNCH

IF NOT BACK BY FIVE OUT TO DINNER AS WELL

ALL QUESTIONS CONCERNS COMMENTS ARE

TO BE HANDED TO THE MINION TO YOUR IMMEDIATE LEFT

Bond frowned at the note then turned to find R standing at his left. "What the?"

"Some guy strolled in, scared the crap out of Q then kidnapped him for lunch...that's all I know..."

"One of these days something like this will not be considered 'Normal'"

Turned out that Nemo really did want to drag the quartermaster out to lunch and they had some very nice sushi and they talked about the old days. Well Nemo talked about the old days and Q tried to convince the man that 'no 007 is not Satan'.

After a very successful lunch Nemo followed Q back to MI6 and back to his office where he sat at R's desk and watched as the minions rushed around doing various tasks.

Finally he had gotten bored and went out to look for his friend, finding him in the gun range explaining a new model of the walther to Bond.

Who immediately drew it on him.

"See? Satan! Every time I see him he tries to kill me!" Nemo whined as the double O threatened him.

"Bond lower your weapon, he's of no threat to us." Q could see this is going to be a VERY long day. "Was there something you needed? I vaguely remember leaving you in Q Branch to do the people watch thing."

Nemo grinned and SKIPPED over to the quartermaster. "I was and I finally figured out what your minions remind me of! Ants! they scuttle around doing whatever pops into your mind!" Suddenly his eyes went comically wide and his mouth dropped open. "Oh if they are ants that makes you their queen!"

This made Bond laugh which he then tried to cover up with a cough. Okay he could see the appeal of the man.

"Very funny Lu isn't there something else that you need be doing?" Q asked making the man grin.

"Nope, I live to bother you dear heart." He grinned making Bond frown.

"Q..."

"Yes?"

"How did he get in here?" He asked.

Q sighed and leaned back, straightening his spine and tilting his head up towards the ceiling. "James, this is my mentor Lu...or Nemo. He is the world's best hacker and has had some tactical training as well...I would be surprised if he COULDN'T get in here. But before you ask, no he isn't a threat to anyone but me and even then it's only to my sanity..." Q stated and then jumped when his phone buzzed in his pocket.

"Crap Alex is in trouble..." He muttered as he ran out the door with his mentor and Bond chasing his heels.

"Alright 006 where exactly are you?" Q asked into his headset ignoring the men behind him.

"Hold on one of the other agents had one of those eye screen things..."

"That's great hold it near your communicator that way I can hack into it and see where you are going..."

Two minutes later they had an image of Alex on the screen, hair in disarray and a few blood splatters on his face. "Ooo, he's pretty." Lu said watching the man put on the eye screen and look around.

"Alright I am in an old castle, filled with agents, the corridors are lined with security cameras, I'm down to four bullets and their guns are weird, And i need to get to the basement...Any help?"

Q brought up the blueprints to the castle and started to talk when suddenly Nemo pulled the communicator from his ear, making him screech in protest.

"Hush you, Hello Alex my name is Nemo and I will be your tour guide. Now tell me, you are trying to get to the dungeon yes?"

"Um, Da.'

"Ooo I love the Russian...alright you just passed the conservatory yes?"

"Da."

"Alright now I want you to go back to the door of the conservatory, face west and move 4 metres down the hall and take two steps to your left."

Q and Bond stared at the man who took over the console and ran Alex through what seemed like a strange dance.

"Alright now what?"

"Do you see the stone shaped like a dented egg?"

"Da."

"Press the one right below it and then the dented egg then step back."

From the eye camera Nemo could see 006's hand reach up to do just that then he jumped back when the hidden door opened. "The hell?"

"That was is a secret tunnel built in the 1100's. They were under attack by the someone or other and the laird had that tunnel built as an escape route for his mistress...apparently he didn't like his wife all that much...now get in and close the door behind you. Your little blue dot is being attacked by four red ones...You know what Mikey this is kind of like live Pac Man..."

"How many times do I have to tell you? My name is not Mike."

"Yes it is."

"You'd think I'd know my own name Nemo."

"Yes you would think that wouldn't you? Alright Alec keep following the tunnel for about twenty metres then take a left."

"Wait I've seen the blue prints for this castle and this tunnel doesn't exist."

"Alec it's an escape tunnel, one that is meant to be a secret tunnel...and you think it's supposed to be on the blueprints?"

"Alright that was a stupid question don't be snarky."

"Snarky is my middle name."

"Yea sure...alright issue i wasn't the first to come here...there are foot prints in the dust."

"Size seven?"

"Da."

"With a small heel?"

"...Da?"

"Yea ignore those, they were mine...don't look at me like that Mikey they had something I wanted. Or at least I thought they did...total waste of time. Anyway this tunnel comes out about eight metres from the armory."

"How will the armory help me?"

"How many bullets does your gun have?"

"Fair point..."

"Mmm yea oh thank you Kira! See Mikey she brought me a cup of something! oh...it's tea... here you can have that...tea is gross..." Nemo remarked handing the cup over his left shoulder where Q stood.

"Alright I'm in the armory...yay guns!"

"Yes hurah hurah now there should be an iron maiden in the back corner of the room, left hand corner..."

"Yea...I hate those things."

"You and me both. Now open it and get inside." Nemo said then yanked off his earpiece at the screech. "Oh shut it you it's another passage way."

"Alright follow that tunnel take the first two lefts ignore keep heading forward for about a hundred metres and then take the first right and the second left, you should be in the DUNGEON not the basement."

"Alright and who are you by the way?"

"Oh, I'm batman didn't you know? anyways do what you need to do down there then just follow the directions backwards to get out of there..."

Lu then handed off the ear piece to Q with a smile. "Now what do you do?"

Q smiled ignoring the stares from his minions. "Just make sure they don't die. Why were you there anyway?"

"Oh I'm still looking for them I thought they had information on their location but they didn't. OH! That reminds me I left a backdoor into their servers..."

Q gave a small smile and then slapped his mentor in the back of the head. "Well that was needless effort Nemo. This entire operation was to gain access to their servers...this was an entire waste of time."

"Well Alec did get to play in some secret tunnel."

"What ever."

The next day Alec came back to MI6 to turn in his equipment and was met with an unfamiliar face sitting at the desk. "Who the hell are you?"

"Batman...why?" Nemo asked giving him a small smile.

"Ah the guide...thank you for that by the way."

"You are very welcome."

"Strange question but how long have you worked here?"

"Oh I don't. I'm just visiting."

At that point 006 drew his gun to point it at Nemo.

Nemo yawned and pressed a button on the desk. "Q!" he whined. "Your Russian isn't playing nice! And why do you give them guns?"

"006 stand down, Nemo is allowed to be here, got permission from M himself. Only god knows how he did that."

"God had nothing to do with it. Any ways all the equipment is here minus one clip of bullets and his radio is...in pieces...how did you manage that?!"

"Magic, I'm Houdini."

"Ha, nice one...want to grab some dinner?"

On the other side of the speaker Bond choked on his coffee. "Oh is he barking up the wrong tree there."

Q frowned. "What do you mean?'

"Alec is strictly heterosexual...What did he just say?!"

"He said that he would love to grab some dinner with Nemo...you have to admit, my mentor is VERY pretty."

Q smirked from the edge of his teacup, his green eyes smiling at the man in front of him. "Besides, you can't know everything about everyone Bond..."

"I guess you can't."

"So why do they call you Nemo?" Alec asked as he sat on the desk across from the hacker.

Nemo looked up, large green eyes locking onto dark blue ones.

"Why Alec, it's because they are always looking for me." he said with a grin making the agent laugh.

"Good point."


	2. Chapter 2

The next week was pretty calm for MI6. Q managed to get almost all of his paperwork done and even had time to be taken on a date by James.

He should have known something was up.

"Heya Mikey." Nemo smiled as he walked into Q Branch with a slightly dim smile.

"Hi Nemo... I've been meaning to ask...how did your date with Alec go?" He smiled up at his mentor.

"Abysmal. He only wanted to find out if I was a threat and try to pump some information from me." Nemo huffed and dropped into a chair beside Q.

"That rat."

"Thank you, makes me feel better even if you don't really mean it." He smiled up at him. "So what are you working on?"

"Just some coding for the firewall. But I do have to outfit 005 for a mission pretty soon, would you like to help?"

"Sure, getting kind of bored here to be honest and this will surely help with that." Nemo sighed as he lifted himself up from the chair to crack his back.

A bored Nemo was never a good thing. He either disappeared (Sometimes for more than a year at a time) or he became slightly destructive. He had been known to hack into Government instillation just to releave the boredom.

Q knew that both options weren't the best thing for anyone so he started to formulate a plan to keep Nemo from being bored.

If he was kept occupied either in Q branch or the RD levels then he wouldn't just disappear or become slightly destructive (they had enough of that from the double O's and they were a handful by themselves).

"Alright Nemo, we'll give you something to do. I have to go with 007 on a mission. I'll leave Q branch to you. But you have to promise me that you will take charge. And no hacking into other instillation's...or at least don't let them find out it came from here." Q intoned making Nemo smile.

"Alright I get it. Do your job while you are off gallivanting with tall blond and angry. I'll stay here and have some fun with the other agents." Nemo grinned making Q sigh.

Q knew that this was a bad idea, leaving Nemo in charge of Q-branch was like leaving a wolf in charge of the sheep. Unfortunately there was no one else that could take the reins at the moment. R was too green and too tenderhearted to do his job at the moment. She still flinched when any double o came into the room. And she had tried to help them on their missions but would flinch every time a gun was fired and cried when she heard someone die.

No, R couldn't be Q.

But Nemo could.

He has the skills for computers. The passion for making gadgets and was just heartless enough to not care when an enemy died. But he wasn't so heartless that he would let an agent die without a fight. The only drawback to Nemo was that he was not an MI6 agent. At least that was what Q told M.

Two days later Q said his good byes, leaving Nemo with Q-branch. He had his equipment and was all ready to go but he kept finding little things to do.

Eventually Bond had to come down to Q-branch and almost physically drag the boffin out.

Nemo laughed then entire time this happened.

 

FIVE DAYS LATER

"Nemo, Have you heard from Bond or Q yet?" Alec asked as he walked into Q branch to find the hacker at the computer.

"No Bond said they needed to go dark for a while but I think this is too long to do so." He muttered as he typed furiously.

"When did he say that?"

"Two day's ago and neither have gotten in touch with me since." He glared at the screen then started to click the mouse furiously.

"What are you doing?"

"A few years ago I decided to keep an eye on Mikey and injected him with a small homing device in case he ever went off grid again. The only person who can turn it on is me and it sends out one signal directly to my computer with his exact location at the time. If he spends more than five minutes in one place it sends out another signal." Nemo remarked as he closed out his laptop and placed it in his bag.

"Where are they?" Alec demanded grabbing Nemo's arm. "They're with the enemy. Those servers they were supposed to destroy? Not only are they still online but their firewalls have gotten incredibly stronger. Which could only mean that they either know that they are targeted or have Mikey and James. Now I'm going to go and get them." He said as he closed his bag and started walking away.

"Not without me you're not."

 

Two hours later they were on the plane and headed into enemy territory. Alec playing a game on his phone while Nemo did something suspicious on his laptop. "So how did you meet Q anyway?" Alec asked.

Nemo's head snapped up and those large violet eyes blinked at him. "What?"

"How did you and Q meet?" Alec asked again making Nemo frown.

"Oh he tried to hack into my computer when he was younger and though he was good he almost made it explode so I tracked him down and decided that he would be very good with a little training...that's all there is to it I guess."

Alec frowned at his story. "He tries to hack into your computer and you decide to train him instead?"

"Well I knew that he wasn't hacking into my computer all by himself. So I told him that I would train him in return for the name of the people who wanted the information on my computer. And as it turns out they had decided to not pay him for all the effort that he put in. So that was the end of it."

Alec nodded and sat back, having run out of things to talk about.

It was a very long flight with the two locked in awkward silence.

Finally they had gotten off the aeroplane and both were relieved to be out of there.

"Alright so first we should-"

"First we're going to go and check into a hotel HONEY." Alec responded making the other man frown at him.

"Actually I was going to say-"

"Come on, SWEETHEART, lets go and check in." Alec almost snarled as he grabbed the man by the hand and almost dragged him to the line of cabs waiting.

At the hotel Alec didn't give Nemo time to speak, instead he dragged him into the hotel room.

"What the hell is with you? Why are you acting so oddly?" Nemo finally demanded.

"Listen we're going to be spending a lot of time together while we're here. And the only way two men spending that much time together won't arouse suspicion is if we pretend we're a couple."

Nemo stared at Alec then huffed out a breath before turning to unpack his things.

"What was your big idea?"

Nemo turned to glare at the agent. "I was going to tell them that you're my mentally deficient brother."

Now it was Alec's turn to glare.

"Listen I've run these ops hundreds of times and-"

"Yea yea yea you know best, you have the experience, I got the message Agent. Now can I get to work finding them?" Nemo sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Alec sighed and started to go through the weapons he brought with him. Checking every millimeter before taking them apart to clean them.

 _This was going to be SUCH a fun operation_. Alec thought as he rolled his eyes.


	3. Rescue in Motion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> okay peoples who actually read this (I suspect few) sorry for the delay in updating but life happened...life sucks. kinda wish i could curse the nomads who made us need money to survive...stupid nomads.

Alec laid back on the bed and watched as Nemo typed furiously on the computer only to stop every once in a while, tip his head, frown, shake his head and continue to type.   
Alec had made the mistake of looking at the computer screen once and now his head hurt tying to figure out what language Nemo was trying to summon a demon with.   
"Alright, good news or bad news first?" the small man asked making the Agent jump in surprise as it was the first time in a few hours that Nemo had spoken. "Bad first, good second."  
"Bad News: Q and Bond have definitely been captured. Good news I have their location and we can get them. Now worse news or really worse news?" Nemo's eyes pinned the Agent.   
"Really worse then worse."  
"Really worse: I can hack their computer systems but not without setting off their alarms. worse news: this is because they have been forcing Q to repair the holes in their system...oh."  
Alec looked up at him as the hacker went pale. "Nemo what-"  
"They've been forcing Q by torturing Bond. We are definitely going to need a med evac for him as well as Q...I found an Email to a doctor that details Bonds injuries and it looks like they've been doing a patch job on healing him." he growled and his fingers started to fly on the keyboard.  
“What are you doing?”  
“Simple I’m sending a virus through an email so that when opened it will shut down everything. I mean even the doors wont unlock or open. So best get ready to go.”

Two hours later Alec found himself standing in front of a dark building with Nemo by his side. “Why are you here again?”  
“I may have gotten too enthusiastic and now I can’t do anything off site so I have to open the doors manually.” Nemo grumbled making Alec grin.   
“You messed up.”  
“Shut it you. 

“Alright so we have to go down this corridor for ten yards, then take the first right and the second left. The third door on the…right is the control room. I’ll control everything from there and lead you through to Mikey and James.” Nemo said as they went through the corridors to find the control room. 

“Alright ear piece working?”  
“Da.”  
“Alrighty then. So I now have control over…everything. Wow this place is fully automated. I’m talking cameras, doors, lights, sinks, toilets…I mean everything. So go down this corridor and on the left you’ll see a small pannel to your left. Alright now go ahead and ignore that for the moment, actually mark that with an X…thank you now go down the corridor and take the third left.” Nemo muttered in his ear.   
Not for the first time, Alec questioned Nemo’s sanity.   
“Alright, so Bond is in the last door to your right. DON’T OPEN THE DOOR YET! Jeeze. Alright there are four…no five people with Bond…two on the wall behind the door two in front of the door as you open it and one directly behind Bond…you’re out numbered here…hold on one second….okay if you go into the room to your right there is an arsenal …cause that’s apparently the best place for it… these people are stupid…okay since you should now be armed with something other than a pistol…go for the katana they don’t run out of bullets…now go rescue Bond while I work on the door for Q.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the REALLY LONG delay the last year has been very hectic for me...I deeply apologize and will try to update more as my life settles a bit.

While Nemo worked on the door his mind fluttered back to when he had first met his friend.

  


_Nemo was sitting in a small cafe with his laptop open and a computer program running. He was trying to decide what to do when a small notification popped up in the upper right hand side._

“ _HAHAHAHA” was all it said making Nemo smile._

_Someone was trying to hack his computer._

“ _Alright you can come in...lets see if you can get out again.” Nemo smiled as he did nothing to stop the hacker, letting him bust his way through to his main screen then brought up a word document._

Now you're in. what's your next move? N

  


_Q stared at the screen he had just hacked into, more importantly he stared at the message from the other side._

What?

Did you really think that you can just hack into my computer without my knowledge? N

well yes

And boys and girls this is what we call........N

call N?

NO this is what we call dumb...or simply NOT SMART N

well I got in just fine.

Ah, but can you get back out again? N  
  


_Q stared at the last message in a panic and tried to log out of the computer._

_He couldn't._

  


Tell you what, if you can somehow manage to get back out again I'll give you what you want. N

_Q thought for a moment then nodded his head before typing a message back._

Deal.

  


_Nemo's smile wore off as time went on and the hacker was still in his computer. Granted Nemo had cut the ties between the hacker and important files but he had hoped that this one might have the skills to get back out._

_Two hours later he was reading a book when a small “DING” went off on his computer._

“ _AWWWW”_

  


_The hacker managed to get back out again._

_Nemo grinned and laughed at the message._

“ _DING”_

“ _Wait...What?”_

“ _HAHAHAHA”_

_Note pad was brought up once more_

  


passed your test and you did say anything I want.

That I did. N

Teach me how you did that

Meet me at the cafe and if you can't track me down then there really is not hope for you. N

You got it.

  


_Two hours later a small man with a laptop under his arm walked into the cafe and made a beeline to the barista and ordered a coffee. While he was waiting for his order he tried to make it look like he wasn't eyeing the customers._

_Nemo lifted his teacup at the man making him blush._

_He walked over with his coffee and sat down at Nemo's table._

“ _Erm...Hello.”_

“ _Hello...So you ready to learn a thing or eight?” Nemo smiled making the man blush._

“ _That's not how that saying goes you know.”_

“ _I know.”_

 

Nemo smiled as the memory flitted through his head and the light went on signalling that the door was open. 

Now it was time to save his little friend. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay in order to keep updating the chapters are not going to be as long as usual...but it will be updated

Nemo ran to the open door to rescue his friend only to be met with gunfire. 

He had forgotten the man in the room standing over his friend. 

"Fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine fine." Nemo grumbled as he walked over to one of the dead men on the floor, grabbed his gun and walked back over to the door. 

" _angle of trajectory, hes behind there...stupid people._ " Nemo grumbled as he lifted the weapon and shot the man clear through the heart. "That's my protege you dickhead." He growled before moving forward to untie Q. "And you're stupid too."

"Anything you want as long as we get out of here....where's Bond?" Q asked as he started typing vigorously.

"Don't bother with that, I'm setting this place ablaze." Nemo growled as he pulled Q away and into the corridor where Alex and Bond waited for them.

"See told you, you had it." Nemo grinned and helped Alex carry Bond out of the building where an emergency evac waited. 

Once on the evac Nemo fiddled with a small tablet then giggled when the building exploded. 

 

It was two weeks before Bond was out of medical. But to be fair it would have been sooner if someone hadn't shot him with a tranquilizer and then duct taped him to the cot.

And to be fair to who ever could have done that to a double 'O' (And if you asked anyone they would refuse to tell you who) Bond had escaped twice before only to be found passed out in Q's office. This in turn caused Q to worry. And you don't make Q worry unless you are willing to put up with Q's teacher. 

And no one wanted that. 


	6. Chapter 6

Nemo sighed as he handed Q a mug of tea.   
"What's wrong?" his protege asked as realized that Nemo was troubled.   
"Hypothetically how much trouble would I be in if...oh I don't know... Maybe just   
maybe...druggedanannoyingagentandstashedhiminacloset...thenhewasfoundbyoneoftheminions?"  
Q sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "What kind of agent?"  
"Hypothetically...one of the double 'o's."  
"They are supposed to be able to take care of themselves. So not much trouble. Though they should know not to accept food or drink from you...Ever." Q replied as   
Nemo started to spin in one of the office chairs. "And don't you have things to do?"  
"Newp. Your boss man told me to wait here. I think he's trying to hire me." Nemo glanced at the door with suspicion.   
"Well good luck to him."  
"I know right?! Oh hey Sally!" Nemo grinned as Bond came into Q's office, only to frown as he was picked up by the agent and deposited outside of the office.   
"HEY!"

"That's one way of getting rid of him." Q grinned as James set two takeout containers on his desk.   
"It's lunch time so no working and no pesky Nemo." James said as he confiscated the keyboard and set it aside.   
"But-"  
"No buts, now eat." James said as he leaned forward to give Q a peck on the lips.

"That was mean." Nemo huffed as he made his way out of Q branch and started to wander around MI6.   
"Hey Lu." Alec said as he fell into step beside the hacker. "Going to lunch?"  
"I don't know yet, just kinda going." Lu grinned at the Russian.   
"Well lunch is this way Маленький волк. Come on I'll treat you."   
"Hey I know what that means and I'm not little!" Nemo growled as he jogged to keep up with his new found friend.

Alec stopped and grabbed Nemo by the shoulders. He then placed a hand on top of Nemo's head then lifted it up to the top of his own. "Маленький волк"  
"Hey what's Russian for jerk?" Nemo huffed making Alec laugh.  
"Damn it Trevelyan. Why do you always have to go so fast?" Eve snarled as she trotted up to the two.   
"He can't help it, He's rushin." Nemo grinned as the two blinked at him then groaned.   
"That was even worse then Bonds pickup lines." Eve groaned and grabbed them both by the wrist and dragged them out the doors of MI6. "Just for that you're buying   
lunch."

 

Маленький волк-little wolf {Russian}

 


	7. Chapter 7

Over the next week, Alec had become more and more protective of Lu and while the hacker thought it was amusing he also thought it was sweet as well.   
“And you don’t want me talking to them why?” Lu asked trying not to smile.  
“They’re double o’s.”  
“Well so are you.”  
“They kill people for a living.”  
“Again, so do you.”  
“That’s different.”  
“Exactly how is that different?” Nemo asked tilting his head a bit.   
“They will try to take advantage of you.” Alec snarled and pressed the heel of his palm to his forehead. He was having a difficult time explaining exactly what he meant.   
“And you think I’m easy to take advantage of?”   
“NO!”  
“Okay so- no you hush now-You don’t want me to talk to the other double o’s in case they try to use their skills against me forcing me to do something that I would rather not do but only doing because I have either been threatened.” Nemo asked leaning forward a little bit.   
“Sort of…no?”  
“Here.” Nemo said as he handed a passing minion a piece of a bit o’ honey.  
Alec looked at the minion then back at Nemo.   
“I’m running an experiment on Q’s minions. Now I’m going to take one more guess at this. You would rather I not speak to the other double o’s because they can be dangerous but also because you’re afraid that I will like them better.” Alec stood extremely still for such a long time that Nemo was getting afraid that he had broken 006.   
Finally, Alec looked down at Nemo and blinked rapidly once his thoughts finished swirling. “…Yes.”  
“Well that’s not going to happen now can we go to lunch?”  
“As long as you tell me about this experiment on Q’s minions.”  
“I’m okay with that… Oh and I have a question for Eve do you think she’ll show?”  
“It’s a possibility. Why? What did you wish to ask her?”  
“Just wondering if I work here.”

 

Over the next three weeks every time Nemo saw any minion he handed them a piece of candy.   
Soon all he had to do was walk into Q Branch and he would see their faces light up.  
“Lu? Can I please talk to you for a moment?” Q said as he forcibly pulled the other hacker into his office and slammed the door.   
“Hey Mikey what’s wrong?”  
“I can’t believe I have to say this but…Can you please not condition my minio-STAFF into liking you?” Q asked and pressed the heel of his palm to his forehead.   
“People have been doing that a lot lately.” Nemo grinned and mimicked his action.   
“That’s the effect you have on people…now about my staff.” Q said and glared his teacher down.   
“Fine fine fine. Besides that experiments over now and it was a success by the way.”   
“Well that’s good to know. Now I have to tell them to not accept anything from anyone.” Q grumbled making Nemo grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like comments...I especially like comments when I am sick...as I am now


	8. Chapter 8

Nemo grinned as he skipped down the corridor of MI6.

“NEMO.” Someone yelled from behind him making him skid to a stop.

 

Nemo turned around to find M glaring at him from down the hall. “Yes?” He inquired as he skipped over to the man.

“If you would be so kind as to follow me?” M asked as he started walking to his office.

 

“Now as you know, we literally cannot keep you out of MI6. Now there are multiple ways to remedy this but I believe the best way would be to just have you employed here. Now this paper here says that you will be working for the RD department. Now we both know that is not true as you will flit from department to department but this just so that we do not have any unauthorized personnel in the building.” M grumbled as he handed Nemo some paperwork.

 

An hour later Nemo was skipping down the corridor yet again, only stopping when he came across Alec.

“You seem happy.” The Russian remarked as he led the hacker to the break room where he pulled out his gun and proceeded to start cleaning it.

“I officially work here.” The smaller man grinned as he leaned over the table.

“That’s wonderful!” Alec grinned back then thought for a moment. “I’ll have to take you out to dinner to celebrate.”

“I wouldn’t be averse to that.” Nemo grinned.

 

That night Nemo spent two hours getting ready for dinner with Alec. Hopefully the Russian had realized by now what his feelings of jealousy and over protection meant but he wasn’t holding his breath.

 

He was just pulling his boots on when his doorbell went off (not that it startled him, not at all and you couldn’t prove it so shut up).

 

On the other side of the door was Alec and he looked breath taking. His blond hair was gelled into spikes and his eyes were outlined in dark black which made the green even more vibrant. His fit body was outlined by a very nice suit that he looked uncomfortable in.

“James made you wear one of his suits, didn’t he?” Nemo tried not to laugh as the Russian nodded his head.

“At least he didn’t put makeup on me like Q did. He also put stuff into my hair.” Alec pouted making Nemo grin.

 

ALEC

 

He had stood at the door for at least five minutes before mentally slapping himself in the face and pressing the doorbell.

“Hey Alec!” Q grinned as he pulled the double o into the flat that he shared with Bond.

“Need your help.” Alec got right to the point making Q a little confused. “What kind of food does Nemo like?”

“He doesn’t dislike anything really…accept anchovies and turkey. Why?” Q asked as he went back to tinkering with a microwave.

“Nemo was officially hired at six and I said I’d take him to dinner tonight to celebrate but I didn’t know if he didn’t like certain foods or not.” Alec answered as he helped himself to a glass of Bonds whiskey.

“That’s nice what are you wearing for your date?” Bond asked as he flipped a page in his book then frowned as Alec gestured to the t-shirt and jeans he was wearing.

“Really Alec?” Q scoffed as he dropped his tools and walked over. “James, do you have a suit that will fit him?” He asked as he forced the Russian into a chair.

 

 

Half an hour later Alec was standing outside Nemos flat but this time he was more than prepared this time to press the doorbell.

When he did, he was faced with a very handsome Nemo.

His hair was still black but now had green streaked in it which made his violet eyes pop. He was wearing a casual suit with a few buttons undone.

He was breath taking.

 

“Where would you like to go for dinner?” Alec asked he regained his voice.

“I don’t know…do you like Chinese?” Nemo asked as he led the agent out of the flat. R

“Sounds good to me.”

 

Half an hour later they were seated in the restaurant and had gotten past the awkward conversation phase of the date.

 

“You’re kidding.” Alec said as he used his chopsticks to grab a coconut shrimp and pop it into his mouth.

“Nope, apparently it’s very easy to condition Q’s minions into liking you. All you need is sweets.” Nemo grinned as he used his spoon to swirl his soup making Alec grin.

“I’ll have to try that.”

“Can’t Q said that he was going to warn them not to accept anything from anyone now.” Nemo pouted.

 

Dinner went very well and when Alec dropped Q off to his flat he was pleasantly surprised to be invited in for a nightcap.

 

THREE HOURS LATER

 

“Oh come on!” Nemo growled as he shook the controller making Alec laugh. “Nice try! That’s another shot for you!” The Agent laughed as he poured the hacker another shot of tequila. “And here’s your lemon and salt.”

“Hush I know how to tequila.”

“What?”

“I KNOW HOW TO TEQUILA!” Nemo almost shouted making the agent wince and made himself giggle uncontrollably.

“What’s the name of this game again?”

“Halo…OH there’s a grunt! Headshot agent 6!” Nemo demanded then started giggling once again as the agent did just that. Alec then laughed as the grunts head burst into confetti and heard the game go ‘YAAAY!’

 

Alec looked over to find Nemo propped up against the couch, shot glass drained but long forgotten, controller held limply in his hand and a glassy look in his eye.

“Alright I think it’s time for bed.” Alec stated as he got to his feet.

“Why agent I didn’t know you were so forward!” Nemo giggled once again then picked up his controller again. “And I’m having fun!”

“So am I but you can barely keep yourself upright. So off to bed with you!” Alec growled as he leaned down and picked the hacker up.

Nemo gasped at his action then wrapped his arms around the agents’ neck. “ _I’m a pretty princess!”_ he whispered in awe then started giggling once again. “But you’re drunk toooooo! You can’t drive! You can stay here.”

Alec grinned at the matter of fact tone that was mumbled into his neck. “Might do that, where is your bedroom?”

“That door.” Nemo grinned as he pointed to his bedroom door then let out an ‘oomph’ as he was dropped onto the bed.

“I’m going to kip on your couch.” Alec said then let out a growl as he was pulled down onto the bed. “No stay here. Big bed, small couch…drunk Nemo.” Nemo giggled and sobered then looked around.

“What are you looking for?”

“Pj’s…there they are…turn around.” Nemo demanded as he hoisted himself to the edge of the bed then proceeded to change into his pajama bottoms then crawl under the covers.

“Wait agent needs pj’s too.”

“Agent has boxers.”

“Good agent.” Nemo grinned drunkenly as Alec got into bed beside him. “Good agent, good date.”

“Date?” Alec looked excited and a little scared.

“Food, alcohol and fun…and ended up with us in bed…date. Goodnight.”

“Good night Маленький волк.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much fun to write drunk people while you're sick. Please leave comments! I love comments! They make my sick self feel not as face explody.


End file.
